The Universe Is Going to Catch You

The worst part of this whole Arnold Schwarzenegger love child thing is that we’re now subjected to articles and analysis like this:

Time Magazine – “Sex, Lies, Arrogance: What Makes Powerful Men Behave So Badly?” (5/19/11)

Nancy Gibbs draws a comparison between Schwarzenegger and recently jailed International Monetary Fund chief Dominique Strauss-Kahn, and in this piercing article, she comes to the novel conclusion that powerful men often abuse their power.

In other news, the sun will set in the west this evening.

I remember watching this exact same kind of boneheaded nattering on the TV news when the Eliot Spitzer scandal broke a couple years ago.  They were awash with anguished, hyperventilating commentary in the form of questions that, let’s face it, are rhetorical in nature: “Why do men cheat?  What aren’t they getting in their marriages?  What could the women do differently?”  I was (and am) reminded of the brilliant movie Broadcast News, and Albert Brooks’ reaction to William Hurt’s exposé on date rape: “Wow.  You really blew the lid off nookie.”

Yes, it’s of passing interest that these men did what they did.  But I don’t know why every time this happens the media feels like we need to have a national dialogue on infidelity (I’m purposefully leaving out the allegations of sexual assault against Strauss-Kahn, which are obviously much more serious than garden-variety consensual boning).  Men – and woman, too, let’s not forget – cheat on their spouses.  It’s not solely the province of the rich and powerful, and it’s not something that we’re ever going to solve.

People will stray.  They will get restless.  They will be unfaithful.  They will grow distant from the people they love. They will fall prey to impulses that are base and reckless.  It happens everyday, and Arnold Schwarzenegger and Eliot Spitzer and Tiger Woods and John Edwards are no different than the suburban guy who sneaks next door to bang the friendly housewife with the welcoming smile.  Except that when Schwarzenegger and Company do it, they end up on the news.

Chris Rock, naturally, had the most truthful thing to tell us about this issue, back when he was talking about Bill Clinton. “A man,” he says, “is basically as faithful as his options.”

There’s a little more to it than that, of course, like honoring the commitment you made to your spouse.  But the core of his statement is solid.  It’s easy to be faithful when no one else wants to sleep with you.  As soon as you have an another option, though, the question of fidelity becomes more than academic.

But that doesn’t mean it’s something over which we need to agonize on the evening news.  We will learn nothing from such a discussion, about ourselves or about the men who cheat.  It’s a ratings ploy, pure and simple – the same old titillation and gossip-mongering gussied up as moral conscience.  More of the same, in other words.

Tonight, when the news leads with more speculation about what could have driven Schwarzenegger into the arms of another woman, watch this instead:

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*****

Current listening:

Leftfield – Leftism (1995)